NEWS

WHY COURAGEOUS CONVERSATIONS MATTER

 

“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”

-Winston Churchill

 

When COVID interrupted our Courageous Conversations series from gathering at Barrington’s White House, we worried — would people still come? We had been building beautiful momentum on our learning journey together, exploring everything from The Art of Listening and Cultivating Curiosity to Confronting Prejudice. But we had really just begun.

To our delight, we found our virtual community grew across zip codes, with devotees joining from home and inviting family and friends who could now participate from afar. Fellows stepped up to facilitate breakout dialogues on Zoom, and guest speakers continued to join us from across the country to share wisdom for fostering greater inclusion and belonging wherever we live.

Of course this was all against the backdrop of a life-altering global pandemic, a hyper-polarized presidential campaign, and a national racial reckoning. But we had been building tools and skills to meet this moment — so we did.

To date, over 1,000 people have registered for the monthly series, with upwards of 9,000 webpage views, 2,000 video views and 1,000 podcast downloads. We smile recalling early planning meetings when we hoped maybe 50 people would come?

Though we hold a long view of time for social healing and transformation, we’ve seen seeds begin to bear fruit. Some have started their own efforts or joined in solidarity with others, from book and film clubs to racial healing circles to community advocacy initiatives. We’ve heard people say the series helped them see who is missing from their own civic organizations and social networks, and seek ways to extend invitations and expand representation at tables where they sit.

We have been encouraged by personal acts of courage — sometimes standing up to speak, other times sitting down to listen. In our second season, we transitioned from calling this a “series” to a Courageous Community — by which we mean a community unafraid to explore the sometimes uncomfortable but necessary conversations we must have as neighbors and strangers to build a more inclusive future where everyone belongs.

Looking back on this virtual year and ahead to returning in person, we asked a few community members what they have learned, and why courageous conversations matter to them. Thank you to Sophy and Grant Elliott, Carol and David Nelson, Dr. Cynthia Armendáriz-Maxwell, Susan Padula, and Ellaine Sambo-Reyther for sharing their hearts and their time.

—Rev. Dr. Zina Jacque, Jessica Green & Claire Nelson

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“Courageous Conversations has given me exactly what I was looking for — opportunities to hear new voices and new perspectives. One of my favorite takeaway quotes is: ‘I never learn anything from hearing myself talk.’”

— Carol Nelson, Barrington resident

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“Courageous Conversations is an opportunity to learn, listen, be heard and actively advance our shared humanity. In our home it fostered and framed rich conversations of life experiences —with cross-generational perspectives.”

— Sophy Elliott, Barrington resident

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“The most important and beautiful things that people have to offer are their presence and their differences. Having honest, open, and courageous conversations can allow us to better understand what others bring to the table, and to grow as empathetic humans.”

— Grant Elliott, co-founder, Be The Change Barrington

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“Courageous Conversations have helped me stick with conversations that are sometimes uncomfortable but ultimately give me perspective on the breadth and diversity of perspectives on fundamental issues.”

— Susan Padula, Past Trustee, Village of Barrington

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“This series inspired us to start our own Courageous Conversations at school, and it has given me language and insights to advocate for equity as a shared community value.”

— Dr. Cynthia Armendáriz-Maxwell, Principal, Sunny Hill Elementary School

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“Through Courageous Conversations I am learning that recognizing the diversity and disparities in our many life experiences allows a community to grow in such beautiful ways. Without the courage to speak, listen, and understand, we lose the ability to see our connected future.”

— Ellaine Sambo-Reyther, Barrington resident

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“I have been so happy to see how our community has embraced these conversations — and now we are seeing the positive ripple effects.”

— David Nelson, Barrington resident


YOU ARE INVITED

Courageous Conversations returns to gathering Wednesday, September 8th, 7 p.m. at Barrington’s White House! Second Wednesday evenings through December. Hosted by Rev. Dr. Zina Jacque and Jessica Green and presented by Urban Consulate. Made possible thanks to generous support from Barrington Area Community Foundation, BMO Wealth Management, Jessica & Dominic Green, Kim Duchossois, Tyler & Danielle Lenczuk, Cobey & Erich Struckmeyer, Young Chung, Susan & Rich Padula, Carol & David Nelson, Dennis Barsema, Julie Kanak & Mike Rigali — and ticket purchasers like you!

To signup and support the series, purchase your season ticket here.


Photography by Linda Barrett

With deep gratitude to Carol & David Nelson, Sophy & Grant Elliott, Dr. Cynthia Armendáriz-Maxwell, Susan Padula, and Ellaine Sambo-Reyther for their commitment to building courageous community.


WE BELONG TO EACH OTHER

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“We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny."

-Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

How can we practice social connection in a time of physical distancing?

For the last year, we've been exploring how to foster greater inclusion & belonging in our community through A Year of Courageous Conversations. In keeping with current CDC guidelines to stop the spread of the coronavirus (COVID-19), below are some links & resources from our blog to stay connected while we're physically apart.

Are you registered for our next session?
We're still on! From our homes.
Instructions to follow...

Until then, please stay safe & take care of one another.

Zina, Jess, Claire & Sam
A Year of Courageous Conversations
CourageousConversations.us


Stay Connected

TIPS TO STAY TOGETHER WHILE APART:

  • Practice curiosity: Ask others, what are your concerns & what are your joys?

  • Schedule phone or video dates! (Make good use of the great conversation guides below)

  • Send thank you notes, love letters, compliments & gratitudes

  • Check-in with elders & those separated from their families

  • Invite cross-generational discussions of an article, book, podcast or video together

  • Double-check information you share. Is it accurate? Helpful? Inclusive?

  • Stand up to any bias you may encounter. (Revisit the Confronting Prejudice tips below)

  • Support caregivers, service organizations, small businesses & the most vulnerable

  • Contribute anonymously to a neighbor or stranger who may be in need

  • Practice compassion: Spread love, beauty, humor & hope




THANKS TO OUR PARTNERS

A Year of Courageous Conversations is exploring how to foster greater inclusion & belonging in our community. Presented by Urban Consulate in partnership with Barrington’s White HouseBStrong Together and Barrington Area Library, the series is made possible thanks to generous support from Jessica & Dominic Green, Kim Duchossois, Sue & Rich Padula, Barrington Area Community Foundation and BMO Wealth Management


THANK YOU, CASEY

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We were very sad to learn that Casey Handal, an early advisor for A Year of Courageous Conversations, passed away at the age of 41 after a brave fight with cancer. Casey is survived by her wife Zadette Rosado and daughters Payton & Reese.

You may know Casey from the neighborhood pride flag story that made the national news — and the community response that made Barrington proud. 

Our next session is on Confronting Prejudice, for which Casey was a beautiful messenger. Though she said her family was "pretty devastated" by the initial incident, she used the media coverage to encourage dialogue:

"In a perfect world, I'd love to have a conversation with this person, and find out why they chose to do what they did, and maybe show him or her that we are all human, and should be spreading love and kindness, not hate."

In honor of Casey, and apropos of this moment, the following is a passage from Governor Pritzker's inauguration speech in January 2019, may we all take to heart —

“I see the natural beauty of Illinois every day—in our people. More than anything else I see it in our capacity to be kind.

Consider the story a few weeks ago of Casey Handal and Zadette Rosado. Casey and Zadette moved to Barrington last May and they proudly flew a rainbow flag behind their home. And then someone snuck into their yard and stole it, replacing their pride flag with an American flag – ironic because the thief doesn’t understand that you rob the American flag of meaning when you steal a person’s symbol of self-expression.

That could have been the end of the story, but Casey and Zadette’s neighbor Kimberly Lesley Filian wouldn’t let it be. She put a pride flag in her yard in solidarity. And then she kept buying them because her neighbors kept asking for them too. Soon there were pride flags everywhere – a place that hate had tried to fill was conquered by love instead.

As Kim noted: ‘Frankly, I’ve grown weary of this, of all this hate. And I gotta say, it just seemed like there was one thing that I could do that I had control of.’

Remember that our ability to grow weary of hate fuels our enormous capacity to be kind.”

Thank you, Casey.


COURAGE IN A TIME OF DIVISION

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On November 13, we had the honor of joining Krista Tippett, Lucas Johnson and Eddie Gonzales of On Being and The Civil Conversations Project for a session at Upswell, a national convening in Chicago. Attendees from across the country came to learn about the grounding virtues and guiding questions set forth in the Better Conversations Guide we are using this year in Barrington.

To open the session, Tippett led a group reading of the six Grounding Virtues, including a reading from Fellow Julie Kanak. She then introduced Dr. Zina Jacque and Jessica Swoyer Green to share the "low & slow" approach for A Year of Courageous Conversations, and how we are putting their tools into practice. In an interview with Fetzer Institute, Johnson also lifted up A Year of Courageous Conversations as an example of communities using On Being’s resources to inspire local dialogues.

Said Krista after the conference: "In the following days, I heard from person after person how the example of what you're doing gave them courage to take back to their communities." (Bravo, Barrington!)

Krista will be back in the Chicagoland area on January 31, 2020 for a live On Being recording with Ai-Jen Poo of the National Domestic Workers Alliance in Oak Park, IL. Tickets available here.

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WELCOME, KRISTA TIPPETT

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Can’t wait to welcome Krista Tippett of On Being and The Civil Conversations Project to Barrington on May 23! Good news/bad news: The event is sold out with a waiting list. But we look forward to sharing a few key takeaways here on our blog after the event!

T H E   A D V E N T U R E   O F   C I V I L I T Y

Who will we be to each other?

Thursday, May 23, 2019, 6:30pm

Barrington, Illinois


Our young century is awash with urgent questions of survival, of meaning, of how we structure our common life and who we are to each other. And yet it seems we are more divided than ever before — unable to listen and speak across the differences we must engage to create the world we want for ourselves and our children. 

Krista Tippett's public radio show & podcast, On Being, brings a vast range of voices to the animating questions at the center of life: What does it mean to be human, and how do we want to live? Her Civil Conversations Project has focused these questions on public life, in practical terms, for communities from the deep south to Harvard Law School. 

She will speak with us about how we can all shape our presence to this moment we inhabit and begin to create the conversations we want to be hearing, where we live.


LET'S BE COURAGEOUS

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Welcome to the official blog for A Year of Courageous Conversations.

We have been busy planning a new year-long series of monthly talks & dialogues for the Barrington community. We can’t wait to share with you.

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Please save the date for our launch event—

An Evening With Krista Tippett

On Being & The Civil Conversations Project

Thursday, May 23, 2019, 6:30pm

Barrington High School, Richard Johnson Auditorium

616 West Main Street, Barrington, IL 60010

Free & open to the public

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What happens next?

Monthly conversations begin in September 2019 at Barrington’s White House.

Registration for the series will open in May.

Please join our email list for updates!

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We’ll be adding lots more information & resources here on our website in 2019.

Please bookmark this website & stay tuned…

With Love,

Jessica Swoyer Green, Zina Jacque, Claire Nelson & Lauren Hood